Hello
by BleedAllBlack
Summary: Raven is having wierd and scary dreams. The Titans try to help her, but somethings just can't be helped, and the spawn of a demon is one of them. This has been moved from the comic section.
1. Flashbacks & tears

A/N-Hey this is my first fanfic and I hope you like it! I worked hard on it so please be kind! Ok what you need to know before I start.  
  
Summary: Takes place after the episode 'Nevermore'. Raven is having strange dreams that keep her from sleeping so she's afraid to sleep anymore, how will the Titans help? But some things can't be helped, and the spawn of a demon is one of them. Will Raven stay? Or will she let the new Titan take her place?  
  
Rating: PG-13  
  
Pairings: Raven/Robin  
  
Ok then, on with the fic!  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
It was just one of those nights that you just want to look out into the heavens and try to make out shapes that the stars make. In a large T-shaped tower stood in the horizon. In this tower a girl was looking out her window, staring at the beautiful night sky.  
  
She hummed to her self and reflected back on her life. It started when she was a little girl.  
  
~*~Flash back~*~  
  
"Raven, I told you to stay inside when it got dark!" said a very frantic woman.  
  
She had beautiful dark hair that ended in curls just above her shoulders. She had a milky white complexion with sprinkled freckles over her face and haunting lilac eyes.  
  
"I'm sorry mommy," said a small child that was near tears.  
  
"Don't cry! I forbid you to!" said the woman.  
  
"B-b-ut," said the child with tears running freely from her face now.  
  
The little girl had the same haunting look in her eyes like the woman. You could tell they were related. But the small child had purple hair and a colder look in her eyes.  
  
"Don't say 'but' and what have I told you about crying! Never show emotions, Raven It shows your enemies that you're weak!" said the woman in a chilling voice.  
  
The small child looked like she was going to cry more but before she could the woman had raised her hand and slapped the child across the face leaving a vivid red mark.  
  
~*~End Flashback~*~  
  
Raven felt a sting in the corner of her eyes. She hadn't felt that sting in a long time. Slowly salty water started streaming down her face. Raven got angry with her and slapped herself like her mother did long ago. Then more memories started flooding back.  
  
~*~Flash back~*~  
  
There was fire everywhere and you could see a tall and monstrous figure with many eyes, towering over a life-less woman covered in blood and draped with rags.  
  
There was a 9 year old girl watching in horror as she watched her mother get killed. Why wasn't she doing anything? She had powers. Her mother said so herself.  
  
"R-r-aven, you have to defeat your father, he is the demon that will haunt your dreams for years to come, he is the one that will try to get revenge on you, he-" but the woman was cut short by her screams.  
  
The girl looked away feeling the blood spray on her. But she just flew. She didn't know how but she was flying home. Wherever that was.  
  
~*~End Flash back~*~  
  
Raven still felt the sting from her hand and smiled at the next memory that came.  
  
~*~Flash back~*~  
  
Raven had been staying at an orphanage for long enough. Besides who would want a 16-year-old girl with purple hair and a jewel in her forehead? She had been flying for a long time and she still didn't find a place to stay.  
  
That's when she saw it. A tower. A T-shaped tower. She had heard about this tower. It belonged to the teen titans. She has powers. Why not join? Raven flew towards the tower and took the elevator to the doorway and knocked.  
  
Then a golden alien came to the door. She had auburn hair that went to her waist and neon green eyes.  
  
"Hello," she said with a smile", are you here to deliver pizza?"  
  
"Well, No I was-"she began but was cut short by a deep voice in the background.  
  
"Then go away," the voice said.  
  
"Knock it off, Cyborg." Another voice said.  
  
Raven heard footsteps coming to the door that showed a handsome boy standing next to the alien. Raven did not understand these emotions but she felt something when she saw this boy.  
  
"Hi, Robin," the alien said blushing. She clearly had a crush on this boy.  
  
"I'm here to join." Said Raven, wanting to get to the point.  
  
The rest was history.  
  
~*~End Flash back~*~  
  
Raven smiled at the thought of Robin but felt tormented by the fact that Robin was dating Starfire now and they looked far from breaking up.  
  
Slowly Raven fell into peaceful sleep, if you can call it that.  
  
~*~DREAM~*~  
  
It looked like hell. Fire was everywhere. There was fiery monster standing in front of Raven.  
  
He smiled and said cruelly "Hey, Bitch. Slowly his figure disappeared leaving smoke and little devil like things started devouring Raven piece by piece until she awoke to the sound of someone knocking at her door. 


	2. Battles

A/N-Hello! Time for chapter two! Thanks for reading my story! I hope you like this next chapter! This one not as sad as the first one but its just as good or better. I'm sorry if I sound like a geek. By the way I forgot to put the disclaimer on the other chapter, sorry!  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own teen titans and I never ever will.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Raven awoke, startled by the sound and the horrible nightmare. She looked outside and saw it was still dark. She was sweating and breathing heavily. Then she heard the knock on the door again.  
  
"Who's there?" she said in her normal monotone voice.  
  
"Its Cyborg," came a deep voice ", the alarm went off. We got to go. Are you deaf or something? No offence dark girl but-"  
  
He was silent as Raven came out and gave him the death glare. Slowly, without saying a word, Raven walked towards the recreation room and ignored the looks everyone was giving her. She was still sweating and her face still had the mark she left.  
  
"Umm...Raven, is there something you want to tell us?" whispered Beast Boy.  
  
Raven could have cried then and there if it wasn't for her control.  
  
"Nothing is wrong," though she wanted for it to be her normal voice, it came out shakier than she wanted it to be.  
  
Everyone continued to look at Raven with looks mixed with confusion and sadness. Slowly, like always, everyone forgot about her and went about getting ready to leave and fight crime.  
  
"Who is it this time Robin?" asked Starfire.  
  
"It's Cinderblock, he escaped the high-security prison somehow." Said Robin, looking at the data on his computer.  
  
"Well, let's go then!" said Cyborg.  
  
Raven wasn't feeling like fighting today but she knew what they would say if she didn't.  
  
~*~Thoughts~ *~  
  
"Your name should be chicken." Beast Boy would say.  
  
"Oh, what's wrong? Dark girl afraid to go out at nighttime and fight?" Cyborg would say in an annoying baby voice.  
  
"Why must you be such a coward? We have names for people like you. You're a Inglenook Far quad!" Starfire would say with anger burning in her eyes.  
  
"I knew you were a waist of space." Robin would say only his anger was far worse since he was the leader.  
  
~*~End Thoughts~*~  
  
Raven couldn't bare the thought of Robin being that angry with her. She can't let her team down. Slowly she followed the other Teen Titans out of the tower, her head hanging.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*  
  
They had found Cinderblock outside the Pizza Parlor, terrorizing innocent people.  
  
"Hey, Ugly!" Robin yelled.  
  
Cinderblock turned towards the Titans which were standing on top of a bus. Starfire sent a bolt of green flame towards Cinderblock. When it hit Cinderblock he fell on the ground making a loud noise and a small earthquake.  
  
Robin smiled at Starfire and she smiled back. Raven turned her attention on Cinderblock who was getting up and was about to smash his fist into Beast Boy. But before he could do anything, Raven sent some cars towards Cinderblock which made him fall to the ground but he got up and packed up a car and sent it flying towards Starfire.  
  
"Raven! Save Starfire!" Cyborg Yelled.  
  
"Yoo-hoo?! Raven?! This is NOT the time to zone out!" said a very frantic Beast Boy.  
  
'Should I save her? What has she ever done for me. Besides, she would be out of the picture then.' Raven thought.  
  
~*~Flashback~*~  
  
"That was great Starfire!" Said Robin, smiling.  
  
It was Christmas and they had just stopped Granite from destroying the city. Even though Raven did most of the work, Starfire got most of the praise.  
  
"Hey look, mistletoe." Said Robin pointing up.  
  
"What do we do then?" said Starfire who seemed to know exactly what it means.  
  
"I'll show you." He said.  
  
Slowly their face got closer until their lips met. Little did they know that someone was watching and she was in pain. Raven.  
  
~*~End Flash back~*~  
  
"RAVEN!" cried Robin.  
  
But it was to late, the car was inches from Starfire's face. But the car suddenly stopped in midair and melted. Everyone looked at Raven, but she was as confused as everyone else.  
  
Then they heard a loud and girlish voice. Everyone looked up.  
  
"HEY, YOU!" the voice said. It was a girl.  
  
She was rather tall with red hair and black streaks. She looked like she came out of a Viking book. Her clothes were black and red with knee-high boots and spiked bracelets.  
  
"Pick on someone your own size!" she yelled.  
  
Saying this she took out an arrow and hit Cinderblock on his back. For a minute Cinderblock glowed red, then black and fell to the ground and shattered to million pieces. She turned to the Teen Titans and smiled.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
They were back at the tower. Everyone was praising the new girl that called herself Manzilla. Everyone except Raven. She was far from thanking this person. She glared at them all from her favorite armchair.  
  
"Thank you so much for saving me!" said Starfire smiling brilliantly.  
  
"It was no big deal. Really." She answered.  
  
"But it is a big deal!" said Robin looking extremely happy.  
  
Manzilla smiled and blushed. Raven grimaced as she read Manzilla's mind. She thought Robin was 'cute'. Raven didn't need this at 3 A.M.  
  
"I'm going to bed." She said walking to her room.  
  
Everyone, like always, ignored her.  
  
Raven turned and turned in her bed. She was having another nightmare.  
  
~*~DREAM~*~  
  
Raven didn't know where she was. She looked around at her surroundings. She was in a hedge maze. At first she was to scared to move but reminded herself this was a dream. But if it was a dream why would she think it was dream in the first place. What if it was real? Then all the hedges caught fire and skeletal wolves came into view.  
  
Raven started running but one of the demon wolves caught her cape and started to bite at her hand. Blood started to ooze down her hand she felt a trickle of blood slide down her face.  
  
~*~END DREAM~*~  
  
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
A/N- So what you think? Please review! 


	3. Is no one here?

A/N- Hey! I'm actually going to continue! Well I'm doing my best to add chapters every day so I hope you guys are still reading. I'm sorry I Raven's a little out of character and I promise I will make the chapters longer! Thanx to those who reviewed, you guys are great!  
  
Disclaimer: I wish I owned the Teen Titans but sadly I don't. I really don't need this every chapter! I also don't own 'Hello' by Evanescence. K?  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Raven awoke with a start. Why was she having these dreams? What did they mean? She looked at her alarm clock. It was already 6 A.M. She bit her lower lip and tried to fight back a sob.  
  
"Pull yourself together, Raven," she told herself ",it was only a dream. You've been through worse than a nightmare."  
  
'You know, talking to yourself is the first sign of insanity' a voice came in her head.  
  
Raven started breathing very heavily. She pulled off her covers to reveal her mattress drenched in her sweat. She scratched the back of her neck and undressed and got into the shower.  
  
When she got out she put on her normal uniform and went to the kitchen for some breakfast. She expected the kitchen to be empty but found all the Titans talking and laughing with all the breakfast long gone with the remnants and dirty dishes left. Robin was chatting away with Manzilla and Starfire. Cyborg was lying on his back on a chair with content while Beast Boy was reading a comic.  
  
"Oh, hi Raven. We didn't want to disturb you so we had breakfast without you." Manzilla said with a fake smile, But Raven was the only one that seemed to notice.  
  
"By the way Raven, we came up with a new strategy," said Robin.  
  
"Which is?" she asked but her eyes softening at Robin.  
  
"Well, Manzilla is going to be a new member so we only need five in battle and since you're going through a tough time we thought you'd go through the strategy first." Joined Cyborg.  
  
"What is the Strategy?" asked Raven, clearly loosing her temper.  
  
Everyone noticed this but Beast Boy was quick.  
  
"Well, we thought that you could stay in the tower during battles for a week and use you as a second resort and then next week I stay then Cyborg and so on." He said looking at Raven with a look of guilt in his eyes.  
  
Raven furrowed her eyebrows with her eyes shining with hurt and pain. Why would they be so cruel? She thought they were her friends. Apparently that wasn't the case. Her eyes casted on Robin. He was the leader, how could he let this happen?  
  
"Raven, if you don't-"Robin was cut of by Ravens weak smile.  
  
"No its ok, really." Said Raven, her voice wavering.  
  
With that Raven walked towards her room. Forgetting that she was starving.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
It was mid-afternoon and everyone, not including Raven, was out fighting and actually doing something. Raven sat in her room staring outside at the setting sun. She remembered what happened before the alarm went off at noon.  
  
~*~Flashback~*~  
  
Raven was on the patio staring down at the city.  
  
'It's prettier at night' she thought to herself  
  
"Hello, miss dark-ass." Came a voice behind her.  
  
Raven turned around, startled. It was Manzilla.  
  
"I have better things to do than speak to someone like you." Raven retorted.  
  
"Ohhh.arent we the mean one." She said evilly.  
  
"Go away." Raven answered in a deadly tone  
  
"You're right I can speak to Robin, he's so hot." Manzilla said looking at Ravens face.  
  
She could tell she had struck a nerve. Raven's eyes had opened wide and bit her lower lip.  
  
"You have a crush on him don't you?" Manzilla said icily.  
  
"No, I don't so I suggest you shut up or there'll be a hole in your ass if there isn't one already." Said Raven coolly.  
  
Manzilla raised her eyebrows at this but ignored it just the same.  
  
"You know maybe he'll like you more if you lighten up." She said grinning.  
  
"He never will," said Raven fighting off the hurt ", He and Starfire are dating."  
  
Manzilla looked like she was in deep thought.  
  
"Maybe I can fix that." She said looking wicked.  
  
With that she walked away. Raven stared after her with fear in her eyes. What had she done?  
  
~*~End Flashback~*~  
  
Raven sighed to herself. She felt so alone. She wanted to fight back all her fears but that was impossible. She had so many problems. Her so called friends were acting like she was nothing more than a person living with them. She was having strange nightmares from out of the blue. And Manzilla seemed to be taking her place in the Teen Titans.  
  
She was very troubled and had no one to run to. Then again she was raised that way. She was taught never to show emotions. She was used to being alone from her years at the orphanage. Anyone would have thought that she was prone to these kinds of feelings.  
  
She was disturbed in her chain of thought by the entrance opening and a loud yell of victory. The Titans were back.  
  
Raven flew out her door and went to see how the fight went.  
  
"It was the best fight we ever had!" said Cyborg ", we beet Red-X in three blows!"  
  
"Then what took you so long?" Raven queried.  
  
"Well," Beast Boy hesitated ", We sort of had victory celebration."  
  
"Why didn't you ask me to come along?" asked Raven getting angry.  
  
"Because you don't enjoy it when we have our festivities of celebration." Said Starfire.  
  
"Of course." Said Raven flying to her room.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Raven started crying, she couldn't stand it anymore it was too much.  
  
Playground school bell rings again  
Rain clouds come to play again  
  
She was crying so much her mascara started to drip off.  
  
Has no one told you she's not breathing?  
Hello, I'm your mind giving you someone to talk to  
Hello  
  
She didn't care anymore. Starfire, Beast Boy, Cyborg, None mattered.  
  
If I smile then don't Believe  
Soon I know I'll wake from this dream  
  
Robin. It seemed to echo in her head.  
  
Don't try to fix me I'm not broken  
Hello I'm the lie living for you so you can hide  
Don't cry  
  
She hated this. She hated pain. How can she make it go away?  
  
Suddenly I know I'm not sleeping  
Hello I'm still here all that's left of yesterday  
  
Slowly Raven drifted off to sleep.  
  
~*~DREAM~*~  
  
She was in her nightgown but it was stained with blood.  
  
"Hello? Anyone there?" She called out.  
  
All that followed was laughter and an army of skeletal like creatures appeared in front of her. Slowly they closed in on her and blood sprayed everywhere.  
  
~*~END DREAM~*~  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Hey I'll make it longer next time k? Till next time then! 


	4. The amulet of the griffon & the deadly c...

A/N- Sorry it's sad. I promise it will get a lot better. Ok now I am going to update two times a day because I want to finish before school starts which is in 5 days! And if I don't finish by then I'll update on the weekends!  
  
Disclaimer: You know the drill.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Raven woke up, but not in fear but in confusion. These dreams were getting on her nerve. What could they mean?  
  
'Raven,' said a hollow voice.  
  
"Who's there?" Raven asked getting frightened.  
  
'It's me, mommy.' Came the voice again.  
  
"My mom's dead!" She answered.  
  
'But I wanted to speak to you.' The voice said.  
  
"Fine then, speak." Raven said.  
  
'I notice your pain, child.' The voice said but was less hollow this time.  
  
"So you notice now? How about when I was in the orphanage? Or when I was crying or lonely? Where were you when I was having nightmares?" she said on the verge of tears.  
  
'They only let me speak to you once until you reach 20.' The hollow voice answered.  
  
"Why not wait till then?" she said crying now.  
  
'What did I always tell you about crying?' the voice answered.  
  
There was silence after that. Raven had fallen asleep.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Raven awoke to a knocking at her door. She was still sweaty and a little shaken. Was it a dream too? Yes, it probably was. When she opened the door all the Titans, not including Manzilla were at her door.  
  
They looked extremely angry about something.  
  
"What?" Raven asked.  
  
"Why are you so heartless?" said Cyborg.  
  
"What are you talking about?" Raven was getting confused.  
  
"That prank that you did on Manzilla!" said Robin.  
  
Raven looked hurt as she stared at Robin. Would he believe that she did something like that?  
  
"I didn't do anything." She said truthfully.  
  
"Come off it, Raven! You turned the girl's hair purple for crying out loud!" said a very angry Beast boy.  
  
"But I didn't go near Manzilla since you guys came back last night!" she said.  
  
"Raven, we're just trying to assist you." Said starfire with downcast eyes.  
  
"Yea Raven, we're trying to help you but you just don't want help!" said Cyborg.  
  
"Yea, so why did you turn her hair purple?" said Beast boy.  
  
Raven looked at them. She couldn't believe they would lie like that. Her eyes got blurry. Liars. That's what they are.  
  
"Why don't you guys shut up?! I don't want help! You're lying! I know you are! So just leave me ALONE!" she said shutting her door behind her.  
  
Raven could hear them walking away. She didn't want their pity. Why would they think that she would turn Manzilla's hair purple in the first place? That's when she saw it. A note was on her bed. Why didn't she notice it before?  
  
"What's this?" she asked herself.  
  
She picked it up. It was in cursive she never saw before.  
  
'Dear Raven,  
  
It's me, mom. I know you don't want to believe that you were talking to me last night but I'm afraid it's true. I had to leave you something before I leave so I left my amulet you always liked. I remember when you were a little girl you always admired it.  
  
With Love,  
  
Mother  
  
Raven stood rooted to the spot. Was this really from her mother? It had to be. No one else knew about her mother's amulet except Raven. Not even Trigon knew about it. She remembered that her mother used it when she needed to stay up late and pay bills so she didn't have to sleep.  
  
Raven really did always like the amulet. It was a dark blue gem surrounded by sterling silver in the shape of a griffon. She took the small package next to the note and unwrapped it delicately as if it was the most precious thing in the universe. As she took out the last piece of rope, out fell a beautiful amulet.  
  
Raven put on the amulet and looked in the mirror. With this on she won't be able to sleep. That's one problem solved.  
  
~*~ later that day~*~  
  
Raven never left her room that day. She was to busy being a bookworm. She was as happy as she could be. Even though she was still having second thoughts about her friends she was feeling a lot better now that she had her amulet.  
  
Just then there was a knock on her door.  
  
"Whose there?" she asked hoping it wasn't the Titans here to 'help' her again.  
  
"It's Robin, can I come in?" came his voice.  
  
Raven's stomach fluttered.  
  
"No! I'll come out. No one can come into my room, remember?" she said in her usual monotone.  
  
"Sure, do you want to go on a walk?" He asked as she got out.  
  
"Ummm, alright." She answered, trying not to sound excited.  
  
~*~At the Park~*~  
  
It was a windy fall day. Raven didn't wear her uniform because of the cold. Instead she wore black-dyed jeans and a black turtle-neck sweater with some sneakers.  
  
Robin wore plain jeans and a white T-shirt with a jacket. It was a silent walk. Nothing could be heard except for the wind howling it's way through the trees.  
  
Finally Robin broke the silence.  
  
"So, What's going on?" He asked  
  
"Nothing." Raven said putting up her usual shield.  
  
"Raven, why do you do this?" He asked but with more force in his voice.  
  
Raven didn't know what to say.  
  
"I'm sorry Robin but wouldn't you have more fun talking to Starfire or Manzilla?" she asked with anger clear in her voice.  
  
Robin looked confused for a minute.  
  
"We're just trying to help-"he began.  
  
"Like you helped when you left me behind when you were fighting or when you had a great victory party and yet I was left behind like I was in a cage or something?" She asked but more pain filled her voice than anger.  
  
Robin didn't know what to say. He looked awestruck.  
  
"Raven I-we didn't mean it we just thought-"but he was cut short yet again.  
  
"You didn't think at all! Because if you thought at all you would know that I like you, a lot!" she said with her eyes shining.  
  
Robin's jaw fell. He looked at Raven with a look of concern.  
  
"Raven, I like Starfire-"But he couldn't continue Raven had already teleported back to her room.  
  
"-but I love you." He finished but it was too late.  
  
~*~Ravens Room~*~  
  
She wasn't going to cry, she wouldn't allow it. She sat crossed legged on her bed. There were photos on her bed. One of Starfire, Cyborg, Beast Boy, and Robin. She had gotten one of Manzilla from her room. She burned some incense and lit a large candle. She took the photo of Cyborg and burned it easily. She repeated this with the other photos until she reached Robin's photo. She decided to keep that one.  
  
It wasn't like she was extremely angry at them, it was just that she was in a tough state right now and she really didn't need these kinds of things bothering her life.  
  
Slowly the smoke from the flames turned black and an image appeared in the smoke. It was a man. He looked like he didn't have a nose and just one eye.  
  
"Hello, Raven." The man said.  
  
"Who are you?" she asked.  
  
"I am Slade."  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
A/N- Hey what do you think? I'm going to keep writing everyday but remember I need reviews to help me keep going! 


	5. Free at night

A/N- Well thanks so much for Reviewing! And there's nothing to say today so I'm just going to the disclaimer!  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Teen Titans nor do I own 'By Myself' by Linkin Park  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Raven looked at the man. She couldn't believe what she heard. The 'oh-so- mysterious' man, was talking to her through smoke. Robin had told them about Slade when they destroyed the flame monster. Robin didn't know much, so there wasn't a lot to say about it.  
  
After a few minutes Raven found her voice, though she was still a bit shocked.  
  
"W-w-hat do you want?" she asked with a shaky voice.  
  
At this he smirked.  
  
"Well, I see you have many problems going on with the Titans, so we're willing to give you something.Better." He added evilly.  
  
"What are you talking about?" she asked, confusion clear on her face.  
  
He laughed at the look on her face.  
  
"I am willing to give you a scholarship." Slade said.  
  
"To where?" Raven asked, but her voice was calmer.  
  
"To the H.I.V.E. Academy." He said simply.  
  
Raven looked at him like he was crazy.  
  
"I wouldn't join that place if I went insane!" she roared heatedly.  
  
"Yes, well, Raven, please reconsider," he said with a twisted smile", if you want to contact me just.Feed of your anger."  
  
Once he said this the smoke disappeared and all that remained was the soft smell of the incense.  
  
~*~that night~*~  
  
Raven remained awake that night. She was fed up of being stuck in the tower. Even though she didn't leave the tower all day she decided to go on a relaxing walk around town.  
  
She put on a dark-blue sport shirt, some black jeans and a dark jean jacket. She walked out of her room and made sure everyone was asleep. Slowly she inched towards the door.  
  
"Where are you going?" a voice said behind her.  
  
Raven looked behind her. It was Manzilla.  
  
"What do you want?" Raven asked irritably.  
  
"Oh, nothing." She said in her annoying girlish voice.  
  
"Right, then go away." Raven answered getting dangerously aggravated.  
  
"I'm just worried about my team-mate!" she said with a fake worried look.  
  
Raven glared at Manzilla. It was people like her that made her want to reconsider Slade's offer. Wait a minute, what was she thinking?  
  
"I'm leaving." Raven said, hiding her eyes.  
  
As Raven closed the door behind her Manzilla grinned evilly. Her hair was still a little purple but she would live. After all she wouldn't do this to herself if she didn't know the consequence.  
  
Slyly, Manzilla looked around her and made sure no one was awakened by their conversation and took out an old and engraved mirror. She held it up to her face and spoke silently.  
  
" i Hazerath Minethos Delacari! /i " she spoke in a snake-like voice.  
  
A vortex of dark smoke appeared in the mirror. Gradually, a man with a shaded face appeared. Slade.  
  
"I suspect you bring me good news, Manzilla." Slade asked.  
  
"Yes sir. Everything is going as planned. Raven is beginning to see that she belongs on the dark side." Manzilla answered with a wicked smile showing pointed teeth.  
  
"Good, very good." Slade said smiling.  
  
They both started laughing. An evil laugh.  
  
~*~ Near a late-night bakery~*~  
  
Raven was eating a small doughnut while leaning on the telephone pole. For those few seconds, Raven forgot about the Titans. She was thinking about the offer she was give.  
  
'You'd be with other like you.'  
  
'You won't ever have to endure the pain of heartbreak again.'  
  
'You'll make real friends.'  
  
'You'll reach her full potential."  
  
All these thoughts became a whirlwind inside her head. She mentally slapped herself for thinking of reconsidering in the first-place!  
  
'But then again, what did she have for her here?'  
  
'Robin! '  
  
'Robin couldn't care less about you!'  
  
'But my friends-'  
  
'You call those disgraceful pigs friends?!'  
  
Raven was caught in a war with her self. She decided to go back home.  
  
~ What do I do to ignore them behind me?  
  
Do I follow my instincts blindly? ~  
  
She was walking extra slowly, trying to sponge up the facts.  
  
~ Do I hide my pride / from these bad dreams  
  
And give in to sad thoughts that are maddening?~  
  
The facts were clear. She would have a better life if she took the scholarship.  
  
~ Do I / sit here and try to stand it?  
  
Or do I / try to catch them red - handed?  
  
Do I trust some and get fooled by phoniness,  
  
Or do I trust nobody and live in loneliness?~  
  
So what if it was a school for evil students?  
  
~ Because I can't hold on / when I'm stretched so thin  
  
I make the right moves but I'm lost within  
  
I put on my daily façade but then  
  
I just end up getting hurt again~  
  
Deep down Raven was evil too.  
  
~ by myself [myself]  
  
I ask why, but in my mind  
  
I find I can't rely on myself~  
  
~ [myself]  
  
I ask why, but in my mind  
  
I find I can't rely on myself~  
  
Raven picked up her pace and started running.  
  
~ I can't hold on  
  
To what I want when I'm stretched so thin  
  
It's all too much to take in  
  
I can't hold on  
  
To anything watching everything spin  
  
With thoughts of failure sinking in~  
  
She bumped into a few people but she never said sorry.  
  
~ If I  
  
Turn my back I'm defenseless  
  
And to go blindly seems senseless  
  
If I hide my pride and let it all go on / then they'll  
  
Take from me 'till everything is gone  
  
If I let them go I'll be outdone  
  
But if I try to catch them I'll be outrun  
  
If I'm killed by the questions like a cancer  
  
Then I'll be buried in the silence of the answer~  
  
She could already see the tower ahead.  
  
~ [by myself]  
  
[myself]  
  
I ask why, but in my mind  
  
I find I can't rely on myself  
  
[myself]  
  
I ask why, but in my mind  
  
I find I can't rely on myself~  
  
She smiled at her own defiance.  
  
~I can't hold on  
  
To what I want when I'm stretched so thin  
  
It's all too much to take in  
  
I can't hold on  
  
To anything watching everything spin  
  
With thoughts of failure sinking in~  
  
Raven never felt so free before.  
  
~ How do you think / I've lost so much  
  
I'm so afraid / I'm out of touch  
  
How do you expect / I will know what to do  
  
When all I know / Is what you tell me to  
  
Don't you (know)  
  
I can't tell you how to make it (go)  
  
No matter what I do, how hard I (try)  
  
I can't seem to convince myself (why)  
  
I'm stuck on the outside~  
  
She didn't feel like running anymore and glided along the floor instead.  
  
~ I can't hold on  
  
To what I want when I'm stretched so thin  
  
It's all too much to take in  
  
I can't hold on  
  
To anything watching everything spin  
  
With thoughts of failure sinking in~  
  
She entered the tower and closed the door behind her.  
  
~ I can't hold on  
  
To what I want when I'm stretched so thin  
  
It's all too much to take in  
  
I can't hold on  
  
To anything watching everything spin  
  
With thoughts of failure sinking...~ 


	6. Good reflections & bad reflections

A/N- Hey guys! Thanks for reviewing! Right now it's really late so I'm going to finish this tomorrow or something. Oh, to hell with this it'll be finished by the time you're reading this. ;)  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Teen Titans. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
It was morning at the tower. Everyone was awakening to a new day. Everyone that is, except Raven. She still had her amulet on so she couldn't sleep. She had her back to the window and was too deep in thought to notice that it was morning.  
  
'So you're really going to take the scholarship, Raven?' she thought. 'I wonder what I'll tell the others. They'll be angry. That's for certain.  
  
~*~ Thoughts~*~  
  
"You're WHAT!" Cyborg would yell.  
  
Beast boy would have fainted.  
  
Starfire would start crying.  
  
And Robin, with all the disappointment in her, would just stare and her with eyes that told her she was wrong.  
  
She could already see Manzilla's Taunting face.  
  
~*~End thoughts~*~  
  
"RAVEN! BREAKFAST!" Hollered Cyborg from the kitchen.  
  
'I'm coming' Raven told telepathically.  
  
Raven arose from her chair and looked in her vanity. She looked horrible. She had circles under her eyes and her eyes were dimmed from the lack of happiness, in fact the only time that she felt happy for the past weeks was last night.  
  
How could she be happy if she was about to turn her back on her friends and go to an Academy for Villainy?  
  
'What do you mean by friends?' she asked herself.  
  
She was walking to the door but stopped as she touched the cold steel. She looked at the statue by her bookcase. She was sure she had it next to her precious mirror before.  
  
The statue was an odd one. It was a sculpture of two masks. On was a sad face and the other a laughing one. But the laugh had something to it that she couldn't put her finger on. It was as if the statue was laughing at the expense of another.  
  
Raven shook off the strange feeling and opened her door.  
  
~*~ Kitchen ~*~  
  
Everyone was sitting at the table except Robin. Starfire was sobbing hysterically onto Cyborg's shoulder while Beast Boy looked through shaded eyes. Raven, fearing the worst, spoke up.  
  
"Where's Robin?" she asked a little shakier than she felt.  
  
Beast boy was making signs behind Starfire, telling Raven not to ask but Raven didn't seem to notice.  
  
"He's in his room." Said Cyborg.  
  
"Why is Starfire crying?" she asked feeling relieved that Robin's ok.  
  
"Robin uhhh..." started Beast Boy.  
  
"Robin BROKE UP WITH ME!!!" yelled Starfire as she glided to her room and shut the door behind her.  
  
"Poor Starfire." Cyborg whispered.  
  
Raven looked away from the others. They broke up? But why? They looked so happy. Then a sudden thought found its way into Ravens head.  
  
'Thought he'd never do it.' It was Manzilla.  
  
Raven looked at Manzilla.  
  
'I finally have him all to myself.' The thought continued.  
  
Raven covered her ears and started running towards her room and mega- locked it so no one could ever come in. She took out the incense and the same candle as before. She also took off her pendant just incase.  
  
She closed her eyes and thought about all the bad things that had happened before. Her friends that treated her like nothing. Manzilla. Being caught up in the middle of things. But she couldn't finish.  
  
There came a loud beeping and knew instantly that the alarm went off. She heard a loud knock at her door.  
  
"Raven, Starfire's not going! We need you!" Cyborg said.  
  
Raven thought for a moment. She should help, it was the least she could do if she's going to leave.  
  
"I'll be right there." She spoke silently.  
  
She arose from her spot and headed to the door. Then she heard a voice from behind her.  
  
'Raven' it seemed to echo in a horrible way.  
  
She looked around, troubled by the voice. Her eyes fell on the statue. It looked different than before; the laughing one looked more evil than earlier. She stared at harder. The one with sorrow in its yes looked so ominous that you'd be surprised if you can stay in the same room with it.  
  
"Raven! We're waiting for you!" Cyborg yelled.  
  
"Coming." She said in her monotone.  
  
She will speak to Slade later. And with one last look at the statue, Raven left her room.  
  
~*~ On the Streets ~*~  
  
It was noon so lots of people were on the streets, at least until a certain monster came out. It was Albacore, the sea monster.  
  
"Hey didn't your mother ever teach you to play nice?" asked Robin.  
  
Raven always liked how Robin would say those kinds of things before he fought them. And unknown to anyone, Raven blushed.  
  
Then both Robin and Cyborg sent the Sonic-Boom attack towards the slimy creature. It did some damage but not enough.  
  
Manzilla took out an arrow and spoke coldly, "Lets see how you like this."  
  
As she said this she threw the deadly arrow at Albacore. Albacore roared angrily and stretched a clawed hand towards Manzilla. He managed to scratch her face before he was engulfed in darkness by Raven.  
  
As he turned into a shadow statue, Raven flew behind Manzilla and took and arrow from her basket and flew towards Albacore's face. With one last smirk, Raven implanted the arrow on the monsters forehead and watched as it crumbled into a million pieces.  
  
She looked at the others and raised her head up as she flew towards the tower; the others gawked at her retreating form.  
  
~*~ Raven's room ~*~  
  
It was really late. Raven closed the door behind her and lit the candles in her room. She took a few glances at the statue and saw that it was unmoving. She finally closed her eyes and concentrated on her anger.  
  
Slowly, a figure appeared in the smoke from the candles. Slade had come back.  
  
"Well Raven, have you considered my offer yet?" he asked the troubled youth.  
  
Raven hesitated. Was she doing the right thing? She hoped she was.  
  
At first she couldn't find her voice, and then she started stammering when finally she could talk.  
  
"Y-y-es I-I want to t-t-ake the scholar-"she couldn't finish.  
  
She just looked at Slade, hoping he knew what she was talking about. To her surprise, he was smiling.  
  
"Very good indeed. You are, as of now, enrolled in the H.I.V.E. Academy. You shall receive a letter shortly consisting of all that you will need, your transportation, etc." He said, smiling a wicked smile.  
  
Raven wanted to ask more questions but he disappeared at the sound of her door knocking. Raven sighed hoping she did the right thing. She walked towards the door and opened it enough to show part of her face. It was Robin.  
  
"Hi," he said ", I want to talk to you, please let me come in."  
  
Raven looked into his masked eyes.  
  
"Very well." She said in a monotone voice.  
  
"Listen, I've been meaning to tell you that," he began ", you are a very special person and that you mean a lot to me."  
  
Raven couldn't believe what she was hearing.  
  
"Look, what I'm trying to say is that, I Love you." He said but you couldn't really tell what kind of face he was showing.  
  
Raven stared wide eyed at Robin. Did she hear him correctly? She hoped she did. At first she was speechless. There was a lot of silence when finally,  
  
"I love you too, Robin." Tumbled out of Ravens mouth.  
  
Robin looked at Raven and Raven looked at Robin. Their faces were inches apart and they were slowly filling the gap. Raven could feel Robin's breath. They were so close until their lips met.  
  
It was a short yet passionate kiss but it ended too soon for Raven as the sound of Cyborg's snores sounded through the Tower.  
  
"I better go." Robin said.  
  
As he got up he smiled at Raven and to his surprise she smiled back.  
  
When Raven closed the door she looked at her reflection. She seemed happier. Her eyes were less dim and the dark circles under her eyes were receding. She should stay she thought. She is going to contact Slade and tell him to forget it.  
  
But she looked at the table were the candle was. The amulet was on top of it.  
  
'Looks like Ravens going to go beddy-by." Came a hollow voice.  
  
Raven looked at the statue. It was laughing.  
  
She couldn't do anything except close her eyes.  
  
~*~DREAM~*~  
  
She was in the middle of no where. Her uniform was torn and she was covered in dry blood. She looked around her. Why did she have to take off the amulet? Then in a distance, she heard thunder. It started raining. She was caught in the middle of a storm! The winds howled as they bashed Raven.  
  
The rain stung her skin until it was red and raw. It felt like thousands of wasps stinging her. Then she saw that the water was reaching her knees. Oh no. She was caught in a flash flood. And out of nowhere the water became a sea. Raven was sinking fast.  
  
Then she felt something grab her hand. At first she was thankful until she looked up at her savior. It was horrifying. The thing had no eyes and its teeth were more like fangs. Dripping with blood and all.  
  
The thing grew leathery wings and carried her up to the sky. It felt like forever until they reached a studio. But it was more of a graveyard. Raven started screaming as more things like the one that saved her appeared. They took her by the hand and started to gnaw at her fingers.  
  
~*~END DREAM~*~  
  
Rave woke up on the ground she looked around her and felt her face. It was clammy and sweaty.  
  
"Raven, come to the kitchen." Cyborg said.  
  
But if it wasn't for Cyborg's natural loud voice, Raven wouldn't have heard him. She wondered what could be wrong.  
  
'Do you really have to ask that?' came a voice behind her.  
  
She turned instantly. Her eyes moved across the room. Nothing was in there. That's when her eyes fell on the statue. Evil and ominous than ever.  
  
"Who or what are you?" she asked.  
  
Silence.  
  
"RAVEN!" said Cyborg only this time his voice was fueled with anger.  
  
"I'm coming." She said in her normal voice.  
  
She opened the door and closed it behind her and walked to the Kitchen. Sitting there was all Starfire, Manzilla, Cyborg, Beast Boy, and Robin.  
  
Robin was holding a yellow envelope with a honey comb print and an 'H' seal. 


	7. Purple sky

A/N- Thanxs a bunch for reviewing! It means a lot! Alright sorry I'm not updating as much it's just that dreary days depress me. It's been raining since this morning. Alright sorry I left you guys in suspense just that I ran out of ideas, but now I'm fully reloaded and ready to write! WARNING: Extremely sad!  
  
Disclaimer: If I owned Teen Titans I'd be rich. Am I rich? No. I also don't own 'Imaginary' By Evanescence (I love that band!) and 'In the End' by Linkin Park (love that band too!)  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Raven stared at the others. Have they read my mail? She had fear plastered all over her face. It was so plain that the others were fully convinced. Raven had been enrolled at the H.I.V.E.  
  
There was a long and awkward silence. Raven didn't want to say anything. They all stared at her. There was a mild trace of hurt in their eyes. Raven still couldn't face the fact that she couldn't ask Slade to forget it. She knew if she did, the Titans will never trust her again.  
  
Finally the silence was broken by Raven.  
  
"Why were you guys reading my mail." She asked in her monotone.  
  
"Why?! We didn't even open it! We were too scared! I mean it's a H.I.V.E. Letter with the words 'enrollment' and addressed to Raven! Our friend has just turned into an enemy!" Beast Boy said, very close to tears.  
  
That was the last straw for Starfire. She flew to Raven and hugged her tightly and started to bawl on her shoulder.  
  
"Don't go! Please, stay! We will miss you so much!" Starfire sobbed.  
  
"Starfire, she is the enemy now. We don't hug enemies. We fight them." Said Manzilla as she walked into the kitchen, her hair back to normal.  
  
Starfire was still shedding many tears and Beast Boy's face was now streaked with water. Now it was Cyborg's turn to speak.  
  
"So, that's it, huh?" He asked. "You're just going to leave and join the bad side."  
  
If it was possible for robots to cry, then Cyborg would have. All the attention turned to Robin. He threw the letter at Raven who caught it with both hands.  
  
"I'll give you an hour to pack, then you leave." He said quietly.  
  
Raven stared at him with hurt in her eyes but clearly, she had hurt him worse than he had hurt her. Robin got up and shoved his way through the kitchen. He went up to his room and looked in his mirror. Meanwhile, Raven was packing up her stuff in her room.  
  
~I linger in the doorway  
  
of alarm clock screaming monsters calling my name~  
  
That's when she came across a picture of her and Robin at Starfire's birthday party.  
  
~let me stay  
  
where the wind will whisper to me  
  
where the raindrops as they're falling tell a story~  
  
In the picture, Robin was coaxing Raven into eating some cake.  
  
~in my field of paper flowers  
  
and candy clouds of lullaby~  
  
Raven smiled momentarily but then ripped up the photo.  
  
~I lie inside myself for hours  
  
and watch my purple sky fly over me~  
  
She frowned at the remnants of paper.  
  
~don't say I'm out of touch  
  
with this rampant chaos - your reality~  
  
They were enemies now. All of them.  
  
~I know well what lies beyond my sleeping refuge  
  
the nightmare I built my own world to escape~  
  
She continued packing her stuff. Until she came across the statue.  
  
~in my field of paper flowers  
  
and candy clouds of lullaby~  
  
What will she do with it? She knew.  
  
~i lie inside myself for hours  
  
and watch my purple sky fly over me~  
  
She took hold of the statue,  
  
~swallowed up in the sound of my screaming  
  
cannot cease for the fear of silent nights  
  
oh how I long for the deep sleep dreaming  
  
the goddess of imaginary light~  
  
And slammed it on the ground.  
  
~in my field of paper flowers  
  
and candy clouds of lullaby~  
  
There came a black smoke from out of the statue and left through the doorway. Raven was confused. What was that thing?  
  
~i lie inside myself for hours  
  
and watch my purple sky fly over me~  
  
Raven knew she'll find out someday but right now she needed to finish packing.  
  
~*~ 1 hour later ~*~  
  
Everyone was standing at the doorway. Everyone had downcast eyes. But most importantly, everyone was resenting Ravens decision. Starfire had already started sobbing the moment Raven had walked out of her room. Beast Boy avoided everyone's gaze. And Cyborg seemed tuned out. But Robin, he looked like the living dead. He was no longer the happy leader he was. He was a sullen-faced boy who looked like he lost everything in the world.  
  
Raven started to shed tears. And mouthed an 'I'm sorry' to them all. She was going to hug Robin but Robin backed away. He was no longer sullen. He was angry.  
  
"I DON'T hug the enemy." He said venomously.  
  
Raven cringed at the venom in his voice.  
  
'It doesn't matter. I have a new life." She thought.  
  
But this thought didn't stop the tears from flowing. Soon she was sobbing harder than Starfire. She wished none of this ever happened. She wished she could stay and pretend none of this ever happened. But she, like the rest, knew that she would never have the trust that they used to have. As Raven hugged them all one last time, her tears stopped flowing.  
  
'They want what's best for me.' She thought.  
  
'They know that this is what I want.' And with that last thought, Raven walked out of the tower. She could still hear Starfire bawling like a wounded animal. Then she remembered all her good times with Starfire.  
  
~*~ Flashback ~*~  
  
It was late afternoon. All the boys had gone to a baseball game. Raven didn't want to go because she didn't enjoy sports. Starfire didn't go because she didn't understand the game.  
  
So Raven was reading and Starfire was cooking.  
  
"Hey, Raven! Could you help me with cooking dinner? I need help." Said Starfire, from the kitchen.  
  
Raven shrugged and told her she'd help. That was the first time Raven ever actually had fun. They experimented with recipes they've never tried before and swapped ones that they had. They even made some of their best ideas for desert. They had a great feast that night. All thanks to Raven and Starfire.  
  
~*~ End Flashback~*~  
  
Raven almost began to cry again. She remembered all the fun times she had with Cyborg and Beast boy.  
  
~*~ Flashback~*~  
  
"Hey Raven! Want to play with us on our 3 player game?" asked Beast Boy.  
  
"Yea, please Raven! We need 3 players or we can't play!" said Cyborg.  
  
"No." she stated simply.  
  
"Oh come on! Please?" Cyborg and Beast Boy said in unison.  
  
Raven looked at their pleading faces and sighed.  
  
"Very well." Raven said.  
  
And they had a blast. Although Raven didn't show it, she was having fun. It turned out Raven won the whole game which made Beast Boy and Cyborg to gawk at her.  
  
~*~ End Flashback~*~  
  
Raven smirked but she was weeping on the inside. She remembered the photo she ripped up earlier.  
  
~*~ Flashback~*~  
  
"Come on, just a little bit of cake!" Robin said hold a spoonful of cake up to Raven's mouth.  
  
Raven just shut her lips together and shoved the spoonful away.  
  
"You know you want it!" Robin persisted.  
  
Raven had enough of this.  
  
"I don't want any-"she began but a spoonful of cake cut her off.  
  
Raven made a goofy look.  
  
"Oh, hold that look!" Cyborg yelled as he took the picture.  
  
~*~ End Flashback~*~  
  
Raven shook off the memories.  
  
'Stop living in the past.' She thought to herself.  
  
That's when she remembered the letter. She took out the letter and read.  
  
~ Dear Raven,  
  
You have been enrolled in the H.I.V.E Academy of Villainy. You will need only a simple bag and some pens and pencils. Bring 4 marble notebooks and a binder. You must catch the Train on Nortenbrook Alley on September 5th at 2 'o clock. The tickets are attached to the letter. Congratulations on being accepted.  
  
Sincerely,  
  
Agatha Brooks  
  
Headmistress~  
  
Raven reread the letter, making sure she read right. September 5th was tomorrow! She checked her pockets. She had just about enough for 3 taxi trips some equipment, a place to spend the night, and a McDonald's burger.  
  
~*~ That night in a small inn~*~  
  
Raven walked in her room and turned on the light. She looked around the room. It was small but elegant just the same. There was only one bed, a vanity, a bathroom and a small refrigerator. Raven dropped her supplies and plopped on her bed. What a day.  
  
She started to cry again.  
  
'No, Raven. You're not going to cry. This is for the best. Right?' she thought to herself.  
  
Raven nodded defiantly and started to walk toward the vanity and opened a drawer attached to it.  
  
~ (It starts with)  
  
One thing / I don't know why  
  
It doesn't even matter how hard you try  
  
Keep that in mind / I designed this rhyme  
  
To explain in due time~  
  
She picked up her supplies and stuffed them inside the drawer.  
  
~ All I know  
  
time is a valuable thing  
  
Watch it fly by as the pendulum swings  
  
Watch it count down to the end of the day  
  
The clock ticks life away~  
  
She took out the clothes she was going to put on tomorrow, but out of her great luck she found a photo album.  
  
~ It's so unreal  
  
didn't look out below  
  
Watch the time go right out the window  
  
Trying to hold on / but didn't even know  
  
Wasted it all just to  
  
Watch you go~  
  
She decided to look at the past, one last time.  
  
~ I kept everything inside and even though I tried / it all fell apart  
  
What it meant to me / will eventually / be a memory / of a time when I  
tried  
  
so hard~  
  
She went through all the pictures, each bringing back tears.  
  
~ And got so far  
  
But in the end  
  
It doesn't even matter  
  
I had to fall  
  
To lose it all  
  
But in the end  
  
It doesn't even matter~  
  
Raven knew that after tonight she will throw away this album.  
  
~ One thing / I don't know why  
  
It doesn't even matter how hard you try  
  
Keep that in mind / I designed this rhyme  
  
To remind myself how  
  
I tried so hard~  
  
But when she came to a picture with Robin, she had enough.  
  
~ In spite of the way you were mocking me  
  
Acting like I was part of your property  
  
Remembering all the times you fought with me  
  
I'm surprised it got so (far)~  
  
Raven threw the album on the floor and started to weep.  
  
~ Things aren't the way they were before  
  
You wouldn't even recognize me anymore  
  
Not that you knew me back then  
  
But it all comes back to me  
  
In the end~  
  
Of all the things she could have found she found the saddest token in her bag.  
  
~ You kept everything inside and even though I tried / it all fell apart  
  
What it meant to me / will eventually / be a memory / of a time when I  
  
I tried so hard~  
  
She wept for hours, wondering how things are going back at the tower.  
  
~ And got so far  
  
But in the end  
  
It doesn't even matter  
  
I had to fall  
  
To lose it all  
  
But in the end  
  
It doesn't even matter~  
  
Finally after endless hours Raven stopped crying and looked at the bedside clock. It was 1 A.M.  
  
~ I've put my trust in you  
  
Pushed as far as I can go  
  
And for all this  
  
There's only one thing you should know~  
  
Raven undressed and took a quick shower to wash away all the tears and worries she had.  
  
~ I've put my trust in you  
  
Pushed as far as I can go  
  
And for all this  
  
There's only one thing you should know~  
  
She looked at the Album on the floor. She picked it up and threw it out.  
  
~ I tried so hard  
  
And got so far  
  
But in the end  
  
It doesn't even matter  
  
I had to fall  
  
To lose it all  
  
But in the end  
  
It doesn't even matter~  
  
Raven walked up to her bed and tried not to sleep but she closed her eyes for a few seconds and fell into her dreams.  
  
~*~ DREAM ~*~  
  
Raven was alone in complete darkness. Everyone was gone. She sat on the stone floor, sobbing in both pain and loneliness. That's when a breath of hot fire burned the back of her neck. She turned but the pain blinded her. She tried yelling but more fire escaped into her throat.  
  
"HELP!" was all that escaped.  
  
~*~ END DREAM ~*~  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
A/N-So what do you think so far? I love writing! I'll update real soon! 


	8. The train of despair

A/N- Sorry I didn't update much! Schools hardly started and it's killing me. So let's get on with the disclaimer.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Teen Titans, but maybe they'll let me borrow it for a day!  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Raven woke up from her sleep. She looked at the vanity across the room. Her eyes were dim again. She forgot to put on the stupid amulet. She gave an unhappy puff and looked out the small window. It was a cloudy and foggy day.  
  
"Great. My luck has no boundaries." Raven said sarcastically.  
  
She got out of bed and got dressed. She wore a long black skirt and a thick navy-blue sweater. She took the phone and told the bell-boy to pick up her stuff. As she walked towards her bags she stopped in front of the mirror. She looked horrible. Her eyes were bloodshot and dim, she had dark circles under her eyes, and she seemed paler than usual.  
  
"Get a hold of yourself, Raven." She told herself.  
  
The bell-boy came in and looked at Raven.  
  
"Uhhh," he said ", should I come back later?"  
  
Raven turned around, startled.  
  
"No! Just take everything and call a taxi for me." Raven told him.  
  
The bell-boy nodded and put all her bags in the cart and walked out of the room.  
  
Raven ran her hand through her violet hair. If only her mother could see her now. She looked at her mirror and nodded reassuringly. With that done, she walked out of her room.  
  
~*~ In the Taxi ~*~  
  
Raven looked at the Taxi driver. He looked so familiar. They have been riding for 3 hours already and it was 1 'o clock already.  
  
"How much longer till we reach Nortenbrook Alley?" she asked impatiently.  
  
"Only fifteen more minutes till we reach the station miss." He answered in a jolly voice.  
  
Raven sighed and looked out the side window. ~*~ At the Tower ~*~  
  
Manzilla was the only one in the living room. Everyone else was too busy mourning about Raven. She smiled at herself. She had done a good job at helping Slade bring Raven to their side.  
  
That reminded her that she needed to talk to Slade today. She checked if anyone was watching and she pulled out an old mirror.  
  
"Hazerath Minethos Delacari!" she said in a twisted voice.  
  
Slowly, a man appeared on the other side.  
  
"Yes, what is it that you disturb my rest?" He asked. Venom was dripping from his voice.  
  
"Sir, what if Raven comes back?" Manzilla asked.  
  
He chuckled.  
  
"She won't be coming back." He said with a chillingly evil voice.  
  
~*~ Nortenbrook Alley station ~*~  
  
Raven waved at the familiar taxi driver as he drove off into the horizon. She looked back at her train. She walked up to the side and lugged all her bags into the luggage section. She sighed and walked into the train. There were many busy compartments so it took a while for her to find an empty one. When she did she lied on her back and closed her eyes.  
  
For some reason she felt exhausted. Just in case she had put on her amulet before leaving.  
  
There was a knock on the door and Raven lifted an eye-lid. There was girl with curly-blue hair and Orange eyes looking at her with a snotty look on her face.  
  
"Can I sit here?" she drawled.  
  
Raven glared at the girl. Raven had read her mind and it said that this girl thought Raven was a freak. Oh yeah? She'll show her who's a freak.  
  
"No." Raven said, her eyes were glowing red.  
  
"Why not?" the girl asked, no longer drawling.  
  
"Because I don't share compartments with freaks. The girl rolled her eyes and walked in the room anyway. Raven was about to go psycho on her but decided to save her energy for when she really needs it.  
  
After a while the girl spoke.  
  
"Hi, my names Sigrid, what's yours?" she asked but there was still a hint of drawling.  
  
"My name is Raven." Raven answered in her monotone.  
  
"What's wrong? Aren't you happy about going?" Sigrid asked with less drawl this time.  
  
"Well, it's just that, I miss my friends." Raven said with a look of pain in her eyes.  
  
"Then why did you come?" Sigrid asked looking more interested than bored.  
  
Raven smiled at the girl and told her the whole story.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Raven never knew she could have so many things in common with anyone before. She and Sigrid have been talking for two hours! It turns out that Sigrid has the ability to play around with time and used to live in an orphanage but was adopted into the Redance family.  
  
Raven told Sigrid everything there was to tell about her life. Raven finally felt like she was in the right place. They were both in the middle of a conversation about poetry when the train stopped.  
  
"I guess we're here." Sigrid said happily.  
  
Raven looked out of the compartment window. The school was amazing! It was built out of radiant, yellow brick. It was very big with 7 floors and glistening windows. There were engraving around the sides and beautiful mahogany doors.  
  
Raven looked at it with awe and snapped out of it when she heard giggling. She turned around and looked at Sigrid.  
  
"What are you laughing at?" Raven asked with a scowl.  
  
Sigrid continued with her fit of giggles. Raven ignored her and used her powers to pick up Sigrid and drop her with a loud THUMP.  
  
"OWWW! What was that for?" she asked.  
  
"What's so funny?" Raven asked.  
  
"I wasn't laughing at you! I was laughing at that girl!" Sigrid said, pointing out the window.  
  
Most of the kids were getting out of the Train and there was a very rotund girl with pigtails and brown eyes with a very small shirt on.  
  
Raven lifted her eyebrows while Sigrid continued giggling.  
  
~*~ Outside the doors ~*~  
  
Sigrid had finally stopped laughing and Raven was starting to feel less and less like she belonged here. Suddenly the doors opened and there appeared an old woman with purple hair that fell to her waist with white-out eyes.  
  
"Welcome to the H.I.V.E. Academy of Villainy, young ones." The woman said with a misty voice.  
  
"The girls go through the left staircase while boys go through the right. Dinner will begin shortly." She continued.  
  
"Please note that the rules are listed on the wall. If anyone breaks them they will be expelled. Classes will begin tomorrow. The classes consists of Technology, athletics, plotting, history, skills, necromancy, and of course your own special course which include Shockwave, Time, telepathy, bolts, and fire." She finished.  
  
The woman first led the boys to the dormitories then the girls. At the girl's dorms Raven and Sigrid put their beds next to the other.  
  
"So what do you think of the school?" Sigrid asked as she sat on her bed.  
  
Raven looked at Sigrid. She didn't want to tell her what she really felt about the school.  
  
"I think it's great." Raven sad with downcast eyes. She was never a good liar.  
  
Sigrid looked suspicious for a minute but decided to drop the subject and continued unpacking. Raven did the same. As she looked around at the other girls she felt sick to the stomach. They all looked so unfriendly.  
  
'Well of course Raven! This is a school for villainy.' She thought to herself.  
  
Just as everyone finished getting ready, a voice on the intercom told them to go down to dinner.  
  
"Come on Raven!" said Sigrid.  
  
Raven looked at Sigrid's retreating back.  
  
"I'll be right there!" Raven called out to her.  
  
What has she gotten herself into?  
  
~*~ At dinner ~*~  
  
It was a beautiful hall, decorated with many pictures and engravings. Raven was the only one that didn't care about them. She was too busy thinking about one person. Robin.  
  
' He probably hates me.' Raven thought to herself.  
  
"Yoo-hoo! Raven? Are you on this planet?" asked Sigrid.  
  
Raven snapped out of it and looked at Sigrid.  
  
"I'm OK." Raven said.  
  
'No I'm not.' She thought to herself.  
  
~*~ Back at the dorm~*~  
  
Everyone else was asleep. Well, except Raven. Or at least that's what she thought when she walked out of the dorm. She was walking around the girl's common room, looking at the books on the shelf. She couldn't sleep, so she decided to read a while.  
  
"What are you doing up this late?" came a voice.  
  
Raven spun around fast and saw the girl Sigrid was laughing at earlier.  
  
"Nothing just reading." Raven answered.  
  
"You couldn't sleep because you were feeling guilty about abandoning the Teen Titans." The girl stated.  
  
Raven looked amazed.  
  
"I can read minds like you can." The girl said.  
  
When Raven didn't answer the girl continued.  
  
"You don't belong here." The girl said.  
  
"Who are you?" Raven asked.  
  
"Marigold and I want to help you with your problem. You see my father forced me to come here against my will so I'm planning to escape. Are you with me?" Marigold asked holding out her hand.  
  
Raven thought for a minute. She wanted to leave and she knew it. With that pushed aside Raven smiled and shook Marigolds hand.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ 


	9. Weak and Powerless

OMG...I have not updated in forever.I am so disgraced..SORRY..well I'm here now! Disclaimer: I do not own 'Weak and Powerless' by A Perfect Circle or the teen Titans.but I really wish I did ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
~*~Morning at the tower~*~  
  
Manzilla sat at the breakfast table looking at her precious mirror. She smiled wickedly and spoke to the mirror.  
  
"Soon my little friend.soon.."  
  
"Who are you talking to?" asked a voice from behind her.  
  
Manzilla was startled and looked behind her. It was Beast Boy.  
  
"No one, myself. What, it's a free country?" she asked impatiently  
  
Beast Boy stared at her then shook his head.  
  
'Raven, where are you?' he thought to himself 'We're miserable without you, even Robin isn't the same.'  
  
Beast Boy shook his head again and realized that Raven is never coming back. Never.  
  
~*~At Breakfast~*~  
  
Everything was quiet. Starfire was quiet. Cyborg was silent. But Robin was in his room. Nobody really knew what he did in there. Starfire came often to his room and would often talk in there. Starfire wished for them to go out again but she never asked. But she swore to herself she would, though, one day.  
  
All the herbal tea Raven used to drink was locked away under the cupboard, they had to. Starfire would cry every time she saw them. Beast Boy was just as bad . . . he could not go 5 feet near her old room.  
  
Cyborg was not as good a fighter that he used to be when Raven was still around. The only one that wasn't bothered was Manzilla, who acted as though nothing happened.  
  
The only sound that escaped through the table was 'Pass the Veggies.'  
  
~*~ The H.I.V.E Academy~*~  
  
Raven walked through the barren halls. She looked at her left and saw Sigrid chatting away with a green haired girl with bright red eyes. She looked at her right and saw no one she knew. She decided to catch up with Sigrid later, after all, it was free day, therefore she deserved to be free. She had been in the H.I.V.E for 1 month already and she had to admit, it was interesting. While she was here she learned many new things like telekinesis and a little on alchemy. All in all, the only problem was the people and the villainy classes.  
  
Raven and Marigold have been plotting their escape every night and so far they still haven't gotten a good escape plan. Raven loved to be alone and her favorite spot on campus was the pathway into the forest which led to the most beautiful clearance she had ever seen. There were swans swimming gracefully from here to there. The sun was blocked out so there was plenty of shade for Raven's sensitive eyes but there was always something that lit up the place when Raven was there.  
  
She sat on a rock in the clearance that was near the lake. She breathed in deeply. In all this time she could not forget Robin. She never will. Neither will she forget the other titans.  
  
"Robin . . ." she mumbled to herself.  
  
"No, my name's shade,"came a voice from behind her.  
  
Raven was so startled she almost fell into the lake. She turned around and saw a tall, pale, black haired young man a little older than she was.  
  
"What is your name?" he asked  
  
"Raven," she answered "And what are you doing here?"  
  
"Last I checked I was student here." He said sarcastically.  
  
Raven glared at him. She sighed and floated up into the air. She started to float away when Shade called at her back.  
  
"Wait, maybe we can talk?" he called.  
  
Raven stopped, well she did want someone to talk to beside Sigrid or Marigold. She never really talked much to them anyway. She had told Sigrid a lot about herself but not about Robin and since that day on the train, Sigrid did ALL the talking. And she couldn't really talk to marigold about those things. Maybe she should get to know this boy 'Shade'.  
  
"Very well," Raven answered.  
  
Raven and Shade talked for a while, Raven told him about Azrath, her home planet and about the Teen Titans and all her adventures . . . but she never told him about Robin, not yet anyway.  
  
Shade had another name, James, but only his best friends called him that, but all his friends had been dead for a long time because his planet, Jordoran, was destroyed and he was the only one that escaped.  
  
Finally, night came and Raven and Shade had to leave.  
  
"It was nice talking to someone who doesn't try to blow me up into smithereens." Shade said while smiling.  
  
Raven smiled a little and nodded. She and Shade walked away from the clearance together. But the whole time she was thinking of Robin, and only Robin.  
  
~*~ Girls Dormitory 3:00 AM~*~  
  
Raven held on to her amulet, her only protection from her horrific dreams. She was thinking of Slade and how he fooled her. And how she could never go back to the tower . . . then she thought  
  
'Slade and the taxi driver, they sound alike.' She thought. She remembered the Taxi driver that bought her to Nortenbrook Alley. She remembered his cold voice and that even when he spoke jollily he had a feeling of maliciousness. That's why he was so unnerving. His voice was wispy like the sound of smoke coming from her . . . mask statue when it was shattered. No, he can't be . . . maybe he can.  
  
Raven sat up, Marigold had said she would be busy tonight so they can't plan. She decided to make a few phone calls . . . to Slade.  
  
~*~ the Common Room~*~  
  
Raven was hearing the phone ring when she felt someone pick up on the other line. Then, suddenly the lights flickered and a giant hole appeared on the ground. Slade's face appeared like a reflection in water.  
  
"Yes, how may I help you, Raven?" he asked sinisterly.  
  
"Yes, you were the taxi driver, and somehow you possessed my mask statue . . . why?" Raven asked.  
  
"Well Raven, sometime I have to make sure things are done right, so I had to keep my eye on you." He drawled.  
  
Raven glared and turned away. She picked up an object with her mind and threw it at the hole which disappeared before it could get hit.  
  
Raven sighed and felt a tear roll down her cheek. She was losing control of her life.  
  
~*~ Robin's Room 3:30 AM~*~  
  
Robin sat up in a chair sketching a picture of Raven. Her face was perfect; her eyes were shaped like perfect diamonds and were the color of amhyst. Her cloak swished in the air and her hair was everywhere. On his walls were pictures of Raven, that's why whenever Starfire came in here he had to hide it by dimming the lights.  
  
~Tilling my own grave to keep me level  
  
Jam another dragon down the hole  
  
Digging to the rhythm and the echo of a solitary siren  
  
one that pushes me along, and leaves me so  
  
Desperate and ravenous  
  
So weak and powerless  
  
Over you~  
  
He held on to his drawing pencil, he turned up the volume of his boom box, he loved this song.  
  
~Someone feed the monkey While I dig in search of China White as Dracula As I approach the bottom Desperate and ravenous  
  
So weak and powerless  
  
Over you~  
  
He was getting so depressed, almost as depressed as Raven was before she left . . . Raven.  
  
~ Little angel go away  
  
Come again some other day  
  
The devil has my ear today  
  
I'll never hear a word you say  
  
He promised I would find a little  
  
Solace and some peace of mind  
  
Whatever, just as long as I don't feel so  
  
Desperate and ravenous  
  
So weak and powerless~  
  
He was almost done with the sketch, almost.  
  
~ Desperate and ravenous  
  
So weak and powerless Over you~  
  
Done.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ Well what you think? Thank you soooo much for the reviews *sniffles* they mean a lot! ( 


	10. Loss

HI, back again for another chapter! Gosh, I'm so cheery today! *Let me guess, I annoy you right?* Lol, sorry, on with chapter 10~ Disclaimer~ I own nothing . . . nada. . . zilch . . .  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
~*~ Tower- 7:00 A.M. ~*~  
  
It was all quiet in Robin's room . . . until the alarm went off.  
  
"What?!" Robin yelled while he woke up with a start.  
  
He looked down at his sketch of Raven and smiled. It looked exactly like her, she deserved it.  
  
'What do you mean she deserved it?' Robin thought to himself 'She betrayed the whole team!'  
  
With that thought Robin got up and shook his head. He was an idiot letting a girl with a devil-knows-what kind of past into the Teen Titans.  
  
'Admit it Robin, she was always like this, she was always evil.' Robin winced at his own thoughts. He winced at the word 'evil'  
  
He got up and set everything that happened in the last few months. Funny how when Manzanilla came everything started falling apart. Probably just a coincidence. After all, Manzanilla was a great fighter, she wouldn't do anything like get rid of Raven on purpose . . . right?  
  
~*~ Living room of the tower 8:00 A.M~*~  
  
Beast boy sat at the table, playing with his food when he looked at how Manzanilla was tapping her foot.  
  
"What?" he asked  
  
"Don't you want to go with Starfire and Cyborg to the mall?" she said  
  
"Not really," beast boy answered "It's really boring."  
  
"Then, go to the movies." Manzanilla said  
  
"No." he said  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because I don't feel like it."  
  
Manzanilla thought for a second and smiled.  
  
"What if I told you can talk to Raven again," she said  
  
"What! How?" he yelled  
  
"No questions can be asked, now leave and I will let you see her some other time, but not today." She said  
  
Beast boy really wanted to see Raven again and decided he'll go. He would investigate Manzanilla later.  
  
And he got up from his stool and left.  
  
"He's such an idiot," Manzanilla said to herself  
  
She took out her mirror, said the magic words and waited.  
  
"What is it?" came a voice from the mirror.  
  
But it wasn't Slade.  
  
"Hey, how's my little Shade?" she asked  
  
"*Chuckles* The boss is going to be happy when I tell him how much information I got from Raven." said Shade  
  
"Sounds like you and her are 'friends' now." Said Manzanilla  
  
"Yea, but I don't think she really trusts me yet."  
  
"Well, there's some bad news. Apparently these morons I'm stuck with miss her. We have to make them hate her. You know, make them see her evil side."  
  
"I think I can talk to the mistress," Shade said while rubbing his chin.  
  
"Oh, one last thing, cuddle up to Raven, the leader has feelings for her, and I want him to see how she's 'moved on'."  
  
"I'll do that, what time shall I perform the deed?" he asked  
  
"Try 2:00 in three days for the evil task and 7:00 in five days when you show Raven how nice you are." She said  
  
"Perfect." ~*~ 9:00 P.M.at the H.I.V.E~*~  
  
Raven was walking through the halls in her uniform. She was tired and she felt drained.  
  
'Eight exams in one day. What are they trying to do?' she thought to herself.  
  
She climbed the endless steps to the girl dormitories and just sat there waiting for Marigold to come up. Most of the girls were already in their beds because Raven had to stay behind and help Professor Merrick with the necromancy tools.  
  
"Hello, Raven." Came a voice  
  
"Good, you're here; I was waiting for a while." Raven said  
  
"But you just came up one minute ago." said Marigold.  
  
Raven shrugged her shoulders and sat next to Marigold. They thought of a few plans but none that would really get them out.  
  
~*~ 3 hours later~*~  
  
"We're not going to finish tonight, Raven" Marigold stated.  
  
"I know, oh well, tomorrow night then."  
  
"I guess, but Raven,"  
  
"What?"  
  
"Can you be my friend?"  
  
"I'm sorry Marigold, but I have no friends. The acquaintances that I make here are nothing but acquaintances, nothing else." Raven said coldly.  
  
And with that said Raven levitated herself to bed.  
  
'Wait a minute, where's my amulet?'  
  
~*~Dream~*~ Raven sat on a cold rock near the sea, waves splashed her ankles while someone ran bony fingers through her hair  
  
"Hello, my little child." It said in an evil voice  
  
Raven felt a knife cutting at her neck, next thing she knew was a lot of screaming, and screaming, and screaming.  
  
~*~ Morning at the H.I.V.E~*~  
  
"MORNING SLEEPYHEAD!"  
  
Raven jumped out of bed and stared wide-eyed at a laughing Sigrid.  
  
"*Laughs* Your *laughs* face *laughs* looks soooooo* laughs* funny!*More laughs*" Sigrid stated.  
  
"Did I mention I hate you?" Raven said She got up and dressed herself, she'll shower later. Her first class was necromancy, her favorite. She took her books and left.  
  
~*~ Necromancy~*~  
  
"Good Morning class"  
  
"Good Morning Professor Merrick" said the class in unison  
  
"Today's lesson shall be about bringing back the dead. Who here has lost someone?"  
  
A few people raised their hands, Raven included.  
  
"Well, we could use necromancy to bring them back by using this little object."  
  
Prof. Merrick took out a small little bell.  
  
"Does anyone know what this is used for?"  
  
No hands were raised.  
  
"Well, this little bell can bring us into the Spirit world and if you don't use it correctly, who knows?"  
  
Nobody raised their hands.  
  
"You get stuck in the realm of spirits."  
  
~*~ At dinner~*~  
  
Raven sat alone, Sigrid said Raven wasn't popular enough to be hung out with. Raven didn't care, she never cared.  
  
"Hey, why the long face?" said a voice.  
  
It was Shade.  
  
"Hello" Raven said as she played with her food.  
  
"So why are you sad?"  
  
"Because I should have never come here."  
  
"But at least you're happier, right?"  
  
"Actually, I feel the exact opposite of that question."  
  
"Well why don't we go for a walk, say Monday at 7:00?"  
  
Raven raised an eye brow.  
  
"Ok, sounds like a good plan."  
  
After dinner, Raven sat in her chair. She couldn't sleep. Where is my amulet? Where could it be? That was my mother's. The last remnant of my mother. My protection from fear. What happened to me?  
  
Raven decided to keep her mind off that and wrote a poem  
  
BLACK BIRD  
I fly free,  
I fly alone,  
Until I need assistance,  
Alone I shall roam,  
I need no one,  
I need no emotions,  
I remain impassive,  
I remain how I wish,  
I don't need a team,  
I prefer being alone  
So alone I shall be.  
  
Raven sighed. Where did that come from?  
  
~*~ 3 hours later~*~  
  
Raven's eyes were drooping, they finally closed.  
  
~*~ DREAM~*~ "Back again!" came an inhuman voice.  
  
Raven looked at herself. She was covered in blood, her blood.  
  
Skeletal and demonic figures appeared and started to burn her skin, she could actually feel it.  
  
~*~ End Dream~*~  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
What do you think? Review! 


	11. Author's cough sorry cough note

A/N- I guess some of you are confused about my two stories. Let me just make it clear for you all that they are two different stories and I apologize for the slight Uhhh…misunderstanding :: sweat drop::


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